I realize a huge trigger of my anxiety is death. The finality of it. 25 years ago I danced with it frequently. A couple times it almost claimed me permanently. I tried changing myself to fit in even further. Still, no matter what I did I couldn’t care one way or another if I livedContinue reading “End of the line.”
Author Archives: Snowy Owl
Typically misrepresented
Everyone talks about atypical on Netflix. I’m not a fan. Mainly because of the bs drama is still making Sam out to be the cause of everyone’s stress. I get that, but I thought it was supposed to be about Sam but too much focus is on everyone else’s problems. I much preferred on theContinue reading “Typically misrepresented”
Cracks in the concrete
I’ve been seeing things that make me wonder what I am supposed to prepare for? My grandmother carrying a big heavy battle axe ready to split a skull. My grandfather standing under falling waters. My father cutting down a large tree. People attacking others and not showing remorse. Those who have fought long and hard,Continue reading “Cracks in the concrete”
Lies and what lies between
All my life I have had a connection with everything around me. Understanding deeply the truths of each thing. The problem with that is nobody likes being that vulnerable. So you pretend to be naive or ignorant to what people say or do. You pretend to believe their lies or play along with the game.Continue reading “Lies and what lies between”
Home(less) of the brave
There’s been a lot of stuff going on over the past few weeks. There’s never the “right time” or whatever to post or even try to post. It’s hard for so many nowadays. Everyone is trying to get back to their entertained state of convenience. It’s getting uglier than ever out there. There’s something thoughContinue reading “Home(less) of the brave”
Spitting into the wind
You can not carry water in a broken vessel. You can not fly across to water with a hole in your sail. Anger and frustration causes fractures and cracks in your walls. It leaves your spirit exposed and vulnerable. While you may feel strong some days, really you’re just punching holes it the walls andContinue reading “Spitting into the wind”
Anxiously awake
I really don’t like to spend time worrying about birthdays, but since I started being sick they more feel like a mark on a doomsday clock. That’s a depressing way to think of it I’m sure, but since I have been unable to do anything since this started I feel I’m wasting time. I spendContinue reading “Anxiously awake”
Someone left the gate open
All the noises tonight are loud. My rural town sounds more like a city. People everywhere are out in droves. Cars are revving their engines. Tires are squealing. Horns, dogs, planes and kids are all filling the air with noise. One noise breaks through the chaos and snaps my focus. In the tree on theContinue reading “Someone left the gate open”
Who am I?
No longer do I recognize myself. I look at pictures from the past and I don’t see me. I see familiar things, but I don’t see me. Things that are in my past, are passed by as if not existing. Who am I? Sense of normalcy is gone. That’s the new normal. I still getContinue reading “Who am I?”
Reality b(y)tes
Everyday it gets worse. My inability to deal with the mass stupidity that is Americans and their “right to freedom.” I have seen the mass movement of ignorance and stupidity waving as proud as they wave flags of fascist leaders and racist confederacy. Still to this day it is the sounding horn of there battleContinue reading “Reality b(y)tes”